Chikhalidwe cha mabodza
Ali mwana, munthu amatha kupeŵa mikhalidwe yosasangalatsa. Ndipo mwanayo akamadziwa kuti adzalangidwa, adzakana kapena kusiya chirichonse chimene wachita, ndiko kuti, kugwiritsa ntchito mabodza mu ubale wake ndi makolo ake. Mchitidwe wonyenga umene timagwiritsa ntchito kupeŵa zotsatira zosasangalatsa. Koma ngati izi zikhala khalidwe lachizoloŵezi, zimawopsya kukhala khalidwe la munthu.
Akatswiri a zamaganizo amakhulupirira kuti makhalidwe ena amachititsa kuti azilankhulana momasuka. Ndikuganiza, m'moyo mwanu muli anthu omwe amakhulupirira kuti njira zonse ndi zabwino kuti akwaniritse cholinga. Inde, iwo amatha kugwiritsa ntchito mosavuta abwenzi, okondedwa, kuwanyenga okha kuti akwaniritse okha.
Kapena mnzanu akukuuzani kwa maola ambiri za chibwenzi chake chatsopano, amamuwonetsa zokongoletsera ndi diamondi, zomwe mungagule pa kusintha kwake. Iye amawoneka wokondwa, koma iwe umakhumudwa kuti iye amapindulitsa chenicheni. Chikhumbo chowoneka bwinoko kuposa momwe tilili ndichibadwa kuyambira tili ana. Sizimatayika paliponse mu moyo wa munthu wamkulu, mphindi iyi yokha: dziko lachinyengo sayenera kukhalanso m'malo enieni.
Kawirikawiri, chikhalidwe cha mabodza ndi chomwe chimathandiza munthu nthawi zina kuti azitha kusintha chilengedwe. Chinthu chachikulu ndi kusaiwala mawu amodzi - "muyeso".
Dziwani zolemba zabodza
Pamene timakumana ndi mabodza m'moyo, nthawi zambiri timasowa, osadziwa momwe tingachitire. Kaya mungasonyeze kuti simukukhulupirira, koma mwadzidzidzi ndi zoona, kaya inde inde kwa wonyenga, ndiye kuti akhoza kupusitsa mpaka pomwepo. Kodi zizindikiro za bodza ndi ziti? Ngati mukuyang'ana, mukhoza kuzindikira komwe choonadi chiri, komanso kuti nkhani ndi ziti.
• Ngati oyankhulana anu akumasokonezani nthawi zonse, amatanthauzira zokambirana zomwe mukuzifuna, kuziwongolera ndi pang'ono, ndiye musakhulupirire mawu onse omwe atchulidwa.
• Funsani kufotokozera mafunso pokambirana. Ngati mukunama, mayankho amodzi akhoza kutsutsana ndi nkhaniyi.
• Wodziwa bwino mwanjira iliyonse akuwonetsera kusanyalanyaza m'nkhani yake, mwachitsanzo, kwa anzako, muzochitika zotere zikuwonekeratu kuti munthu amayesera njira iliyonse kuti athe kupititsa patsogolo luso lawo pochititsa manyazi ena.
• Kodi interlocutor ayamba kutamanda ntchito zake mwamsanga mutamuuza za zomwe munapindula? Mwinamwake, iye amatsogoleredwa ndi nsanje, sakufuna kuwoneka moyipitsitsa kuposa iwe.
• Palinso zizindikiro zamankhwala zabodza. Mwachitsanzo, mosaganizira mwachinyengo zabodza pa zokambiranazo zikuwoneka zosungulumwa, kupititsa patsogolo komanso kutambasula. Asanayankhe funso losavuta, amapanga pang'ono, koma palibe phokoso lodziwika bwino.
• Nthawi zina anthu, podziwa kuti akunama, ayamba kutsitsa mawu awo, ena mosiyana, kuonjezera, kotero kuti mawuwo akuwoneka okhutiritsa.
• Ambiri amalankhula momasuka, ayamba kubweretsa zifukwa zambiri zosafunikira, zomwe palibe amene adawafunsa. Mwa njira iyi amayesa kudziwonetsera nokha chilungamo chawo.
Kuzindikira mabodza si kophweka, chifukwa pali amisiri abwino oti azivala izo. Kunama kwa iwo kuli ngati mpweya. Iwo sangangokhala moyo popanda izo. Samalani zambiri zazing'ono: mawonekedwe a nkhope, manja, timbo ndi mawu. Chilichonse mu zovuta zidzakuthandizani kuti mubwere ku zotsatira zabwino.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani?
Kodi ndi kofunika kuti misonyezi asonyeze kuti akutsuka madzi? Mwinamwake, mofanana ayi ayi. Yesani kupeza choyamba chimene chinayambitsa munthu kuchita izi. Ngati mumakonda mnyamata, ndipo mumamva kuti iye sali wodzipereka ndi inu, musayambe kumanga khoma kapena kusiya malire. Mwinamwake khalidwe ili kwa iye ndi njira yodzizitetezera kapena chikhumbo chokhala ndi chidwi chabwino pa iwe. Winawake ali ndi mwayi "kuchoka" weniweni ndikulowa m'dziko popanda mavuto. Mudzanena - izi sizomwe mungachite. Inde, izi ndi zoona, koma pakali pano, mwachiwonekere, munthu sangakhoze kapena sangathe kuchita mosiyana, chifukwa ngati akanatha, adzachita mosiyana, sakanatero.
Kunama nthawi zonse kumasonyeza vuto. Pamene wokambirana naye akunena zabodza, muyenera kudzifunsa chifukwa chake amafunikira, zolinga zomwe amatsatira, makamaka mu njira yokondweretsa, yosavuta komanso yovuta yolankhulirana monga kukondana? Ngati mnzanu watsopano kapena bwenzi lanu atagona pa njira yoyamba yolankhulirana, muzinthu zazing'ono, ndiye ganizirani zomwe mungayembekezere m'tsogolomu.
Nazi malingaliro omwe angakuthandizeni kuthana ndi mavuto awa:
• Mvomerezani ndi wothandizana nawo, musamutsutse. Popanda kukana njira yake, wolotayo amatha kufa mwamsanga;
• mosasamala kanthu kuti simukukhudzidwa bwanji ndi kukhumudwa ndi mawu a wolemba nkhani, musalole kuti awonongeke. Kumbukirani kuti nthawi zonse zimapambana amene ali ndi chipiriro ndi chipiriro;
• Ngati mukufunabe kutsimikiza nokha, pempherani chitsimikizo chovomerezeka. Pambuyo pa zonse, palibe amene akufuna kuululira zoonekeratu, ndipo ndondomeko yokhayokha ingathe kuika wabodza m'malo mwake.
Mayesero ...
Mfundo ina yofunika kwambiri: kodi munthu angapewe bwanji chilakolako chofuna kunena zabodza, kumveka zoona? Musamadzilungamire nokha, kuti mabodza anu kwa munthu wabwino. Aliyense apatsidwa ufulu wosankha, timaletsa ufuluwu kunama. Mosakayikira, pali zochitika pamene tikuchita mantha ndi kusadziwa za momwe munthu angayankhire. Pano mupeza kuti mwamuna wa bwenzi lanu ali ndi ambuye, koma iye mwiniyo sadziwa za izo ndipo amakhala wokondwa kwambiri m'banja. Kodi ayenera kunena zoona? Kwa funso ili, mukumvetsa kuti palibe katswiri wa zamaganizo angakupatseni yankho losagwirizana. Chimodzi mwa njira zomwe mungasankhe ndicho kunama. Koma ngati mwachedwa nthawi ya wokondedwa wanu chifukwa chakuti mwakhala mukukumana kwa nthawi yaitali, musafuule kwa iye kuti mwaima pamsewu wamtunda, kuti asaganizire za inu: "Pano pali hood." Kodi mukuona kusiyana kwake? Kotero, kotero bodza sizingakhale chizolowezi, ganizirani izi:
• Yesetsani kumvetsetsa zomwe mukuchita muzochitikazo. Mukufuna kupanga chidwi? Koma pali njira zambiri zomwe mungachite. Lankhulani zosangalatsa, zithunzi ndipo mudzapambana popanda mwano.
• Kuwonekeratu kwabodza nthawi zina kuli kochepa ndipo sikulipira kuwonongeka kwa chikhulupiliro chotayika. Ganizirani ngati simudzachita manyazi ngati choonadi chiwululidwa. Simudzadalira kokha, koma kulemekeza.
• Kulakalaka kulemba nthano kumagwirizana ndi kusowa kwa malingaliro omveka m'moyo. Kwa wolota, ife timatulutsa mtima wina. Chitani zomwe mumakondwera nazo, pezani zinthu zomwe zingabweretseni inu chisangalalo.
• Musasinthe zokambiranazo kuti zikhale zokambirana, tiyeni tiyankhule ndi mnzanuyo.
• Mabodza amatisandutsa ogwidwa ndi bodza. Iwo omwe saopa kufotokoza maganizo awo ndi malingaliro awo, ngakhale kudziwa kuti iwo sangavomerezedwe ndi aliyense, sadzapeza udindo wa wabodza.
Kukhala woona mtima, ndizosatheka kugawa choonadi ndi mabodza, kufotokoza kusiyana pakati pawo. Pambuyo pa zonse, ngakhale pang'ono podzikongoletsera chenichenicho imanyengedwa. Ichi ndi bodza - kodi mungakhale moyo popanda izo, popanda mabodza kwa zabwino - aliyense amasankha yekha. Koma sitidzakambirana ndi inu kapena kuganiza mozama. Musaiwale za mfundo yaikulu ya mgwirizano - musamavulaze.