Munthu aliyense amene amakhala mumtundu wa anthu ayenera kuphunzira kusonkhana, kugwirizana. Koma nthawi zambiri zimakhala kuti kugwirizana uku kumakhala kudalira: makhalidwe kapena zakuthupi. Izi ndi zovuta kutcha zabwino, chifukwa aliyense, poyamba, ayenera kukhala munthu. Choncho, m'pofunika kudziwa momwe mungaphunzire kuti musadalire anthu ena.
Kudalira kwazinthu zakuthupi
Chikhalidwe ichi cha kudalira chimaperekedwa kwa ife kuyambira pachiyambi. Chifukwa chakuti msinkhu winawake mwana amapeza zinthu zonse kwa mwana, amatha kuzimvetsa zochitikazi, motero, nthawi zina zingakhale zovuta kuti aphunzire kukhala moyo wodziimira yekha ndi kudalira yekha. Inde, palinso anthu amene adakumana ndi mavuto kuyambira ali ana, kotero amadziwa masiku akale omwe ayenera kudalira okha. Koma ambiri mwa iwo omwe anakulira m'mabanja okonda bwino amakumana ndi vuto la kudalira chuma pa msinkhu winawake.
Njira yowonjezereka yophunzirira kukhala wodziimira pazinthu zachuma ndi aja omwe makolo awo amasamalidwa kwambiri. Kufuna mwana wake bwino, podziwa kuti adzayenera kugwira ntchito moyo wake wonse, sanapereke kuti apite kuntchito, amaphunzira, nthawi zambiri amalimbikitsidwa, amalola mwana wake kapena mwana wake kuti azipempha ndalama. Chotsatira chake, munthu woteroyo amakula, akupitiriza kuwerengera amayi ndi abambo omwe ayenera kusunga. Ndipotu, gulu lotereli silikudziwa nthawi zonse kuti amadalira, chifukwa amakhala omasuka kwambiri. Koma ngati akuzindikira, samvetsa bwino momwe angapirire nazo izi, chifukwa safuna kusiya moyo wawo wonse. Ndipotu, zinthu zingatheke mosavuta kuposa momwe zikuwonekera. Mwachitsanzo, si chinsinsi kwa wina aliyense kuti makolofe timakhalabe ochepa moyo wathu wonse. Koma pamene tili odziimira payekha, makamaka zachuma, zimakhala zosavuta kupirira ndikukula ndikudzipangitsa okha kusankha zochita. Avot pamene mayi ndi bambo akupitiriza kupereka ndalama, samasiya kulamulira munthu, ngati kuti akadali wachinyamata. Choncho, pofuna kuphunzira kukhala wodzikonda payekha, muyenera choyamba kulingalira ubale wanu ndi makolo anu. Zonsezi, mwinamwake, nthawi zonse amazitcha, stitvatki ndi zinthu. Kuwonjezera apo, ngati kuvomereza kwa chuma sikulola kukhala moyo mosiyana, mwayi wokambirana momasuka ndi abwenzi ndi amuna kapena akazi amatha. Aeto ndi ofunika kwambiri kwa mnyamata aliyense.
Ndifunikanso kukumbukira kuti ndinu munthu wotani. Ngati ali wamng'ono amayesedwa kukhala wodalirika kuti azikhala ndi makolo, ndikukhala okalamba, ena amasiya kulemekeza izi, koma amanyansidwa nawo. Ngakhalenso ngati anzanu sanena izi, diso loyipa limakambirana momveka bwino za chiyanjano cha mnzawo wa ana awo ndipo sichikondweretsedwa ndi izi. Choncho, ngati simukufuna kuti mukhale maso a anzanu monga mwana komanso mfulu yowonjezera, muyenera kubwereza mwamsanga momwe mumagwirizanirana ndi makolo anu.
Udindo wodalirika ungayambe pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Nthawi zambiri zimachitika kuti msungwana amakhala kutali ndi njira ya mnyamata wake. Kumbali imodzi, izi zimawoneka kuti sizomwe zilibe phindu, chifukwa munthu amaonedwa kuti ndi wopeza, koma ku mbali inayo, kudalira chuma kumabweretsa kutsamira kwathunthu pa chirichonse. Kumayambiriro kapena mochedwa mayi uyu amve: "Ndikukupatsani, choncho muyenera kuchita zomwe ndanena." Ngati simukufuna kuti mukhale mbalame yokhazikika mu khola, dziwani kuti musamaope kuyesera kuti mupindule nokha. Inde, nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta, koma ndikukhulupirirani, kumverera kwachisangalalo cha kudzikhutira komwe mumapeza, kudzipezera nokha ndi kuchita zomwe mumakonda, kudzaphimba zoipa zonse zomwe zingakhale pachiyambi pamene msungwanayo akungoyamba njira yake yopezera ndalama. Ndipotu, kuti musadalire anthu, muyenera kudzilemekeza nokha ndikukhulupilira nokha. Munthu aliyense ali ndi luso komanso waluntha, musaope kuwululira nokha ndikudziwa kuti zomwe mumapeza mwaufulu zidzakuthandizani kuti "muyambe kuyenda" ndipo musawope mawa. Koma moyo wolemera pa ndalama za wina aliyense ungasinthe nthawi iliyonse, ndipo zidzakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti "mutuluke mu dzenje".
Kudalira
Pokhala ndi chikhulupiliro cha makhalidwe, nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kumenyana kusiyana ndi kudalira chuma. Chowonadi ndi chakuti kukhudzidwa moona mtima ndi kokongola kumakhala kolimba kwambiri kuposa ndalama. Atsikana ambiri amadziwa kuti sangathe kukhala opanda munthu. Kungakhale munthu wokondedwa, kawirikawiri bwenzi, mbale kapena munthu wapamtima amene ali naye bwino. Chifukwa chakuti timagwirizanitsidwa ndi anthu enieni palibe chachilendo. Koma pamene chojambulidwa ichi chikhala choledzeretsa - ndi nthawi yokantha ala. N'zosatheka kuti moyo wanu waumwini ndi maganizo anu adadalira maganizo ndi kusankha wokondedwa wanu. Kuti muphunzire kusadalira anthu ena, muyenera kuyamba kuphunzira momwe mungakhalire moyo wanu. Muyenera kukhala ndi zofuna zanu, zokhumba zanu, zokondweretsa zanu ndi anzanu. Izi ndizo, zomwe sizingasinthe, ngakhale wokondedwa wanu ataya moyo wanu.
Ndiyenso kukumbukira kuti kuyamba kudalira munthu, timamukankhira kutali ndi mwiniwakeyo. Zingamveke zodabwitsa, koma ziri zofanana. Pamene tikudalira kwambiri anthu, momwe tikufunira kuti tiwachitire komanso pamene tikuyamba kulamulira, izi zimatanthawuza kuti poyamba chiyanjano choyambirira chimasanduka ukapolo wololera: munthu wodalirika ali wokonzeka kuchita chirichonse kuti asunge munthuyo pambali pake. Pomaliza, izi zimapangitsa kuti munthu ayambe kugwiritsa ntchito munthu wodalira iye. Kapena ayi kugonana kumakhala kosafunika, chifukwa yemwe amamukhulupirira, amayamba kukwiyitsidwa, yesetsani kuchepetsa mpata wawo, ndi zina zotero.
Choncho, ngati mukufuna kuti ubale wanu ukhale wachilendo, ndipo chikondi chikondane, phunzirani kufotokozera chikondi ndi kudzidalira. Munthu akakhala ndi chizoloŵezi kwa wina, amasiya kukhala wodzaza, akuyamba kuganiza maganizo a anthu ena ndikukangana ndi magulu omwe adawapanga mwachangu kapena mwachangu. Vitoga, izo zimangosiya kukhala zosangalatsa, chifukwa zimataya zokha. Choncho, ngati mukufuna kuphunzira kukhala wodziimira nokha pa anthu ena, nthawi zambiri muzidzikumbutsa kuti ngati mutatero mudzangowataya. Komanso muyenera kukumbukira nthawi zonse kuti anthu ena amafunika kuti azikhala pawokha, osati makope awo pamaso panu. Palibe amene angakhale wokondwa kupeza pafupi naye mwana wake wamwamuna, yemwe amayang'ana ndi galu maso, ali wokonzeka kuchita chirichonse koma komabe akufuna kukhalabe pafupi naye nthawi zonse kuti asalole kupita kwachiwiri. Kumbukirani kuti anthu amafunika kupereka malo awo, pambuyo pake, adzakuyamikirani kwambiri, chifukwa amadziwa kuti ndinu munthu amene ali ndi moyo wake komanso ngati njira zanu zabalalitsidwa, mudzatha kukhalabe ndi moyo, ndipo simudzavutikira mpaka mapeto a masiku anu. Kusokoneza bongo - nthawi zonse mumasowa mlingo. Choncho, poyankhula ndi wina, kukondana ndi wina, kuti musakhale wodalira, kumbukirani kuti umunthu wanu, zokhumba zanu ndi moyo wanu zimadalira inu nokha osati wina wina.